The Fear Assignment

If someone gave you a book of everything you were afraid to do, what would you do?

Your job is to open it to page one and start working on it.
Your job is to read it like a sermon to the choir inside your head.
Your job is to turn that book of fear into a book of accomplishments.

What is on your page one and what are you going to do about it?

People passionately I follow

I’m inspired daily by other people’s content, so today I thought I’d share who I follow so you can get inspired by them too. Here, I have a collection of artists, bloggers, coaches, authors, and people I admire in general. These are the main people whose content I check weekly, sometimes daily. The kind of people I don’t need to get social media notifications about – I just naturally think of searching them to see if they’ve shared anything new.

Brendon Burchard
High Performance Coach

The Minimalists (Joshua Fields-Milburn & Ryan Nicodemus)
An alternate way to live

Janni Olsson Deler
Swedish Fashion & Lifestyle Blogger

Minimalissimo
Minimalist design blog

Susi Kaufer
Mindset Coach

Derek Sivers
Entrepreneur, founder of CD Baby

Marie Forleo
Author and Host of MarieTV

Mel Robbins
TV presenter and speaker

Gabby Bernstein
Spiritual author and speaker

Marianne Williamson
Presidential Candidate

Gretchen Rubin
Happiness & habits author

Gary Vaynerchuk
Entrepreneur and investor

Elizabeth Gilbert
Writer

Get in the arena

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood.” – Theodore Roosevelt

I was at an event recently where one of the guests drunkenly pulled me aside to give me her two cents on my career choice as a coach: “You’re not experienced enough to help people.” I just sat there, smiling and nodding, with no idea what to say.

I have often wished people understood what I do as a coach better. I occasionally receive criticism for it, on and offline. I get told that personal development is self-indulgent or superficial. However, today I want to share exactly why I disagree.

I’m outrageously passionate about personal growth because I believe wellbeing is a necessity, not a luxury. I believe it is a key ingredient missing from our world. Imagine if we empowered people to truly focus on strengthening their mental health and wellbeing, and living a life full of meaning and fulfillment – truly imagine how much better this world would be. Imagine if we took the time to reflect on how to be more loving, create less conflict, contribute more. And worse, look at what happens when we don’t. We don’t protect ourselves against becoming ill, and being sick is demands far more self-indulgence than investing in our wellbeing ever does. When you are sick, there is nothing you can do but focus on yourself. When you focus on growing and thriving and becoming the happiest you that you can be, you’ve got the capacity to give to others and you have the energy and stamina to focus on outward issues. Put on your own oxygen mask first before assisting others. Everyone knows that.

You know when you think of a really good come back to a comment someone has made, but it’s already too late? For me, that was today, which is about 3 weeks too late to respond to the critic at that event. This is what I wished I had said: “If you’re not in the arena also getting your ass kicked, I’m not interested in your feedback.” – Brené Brown

I’m almost certain one of the reasons my heart pumps blood around my veins is with the intention for me to do the work I do as a coach, a writer, and a personal development enthusiast – and as a woman with that much conviction I’m not about to dull my light or change my entire career just because a spectator is booing me from the sidelines.

Building your success story

Whenever anyone tells me they’re struggling, or they feel like they just so far away from their goal, I always like to tell them: You are building your success story.

Nobody wants to hear the story of the person who sailed through life with no struggles and achieved every goal they ever set without any trouble. Seriously – you’d just feel irritated hearing that.

We want to hear the story of the person who grew up with a hard life and despite all odds, made it to success.

Whatever you’re going through right now, whatever feels tough – know that one day you will tell the story to a room of people hanging on your every word, gobsmacked at what you overcame to become the success you are known for.

Keep going, you are building your success story.

Birthdays

Tomorrow is my sister Helena’s 17th birthday, and we celebrated together with our mum by going out for dinner this evening since I’m leaving NZ tomorrow. 17 is a wonderful age. So close to adulthood, yet still in childhood. Feels very Peter Pan to me! We ate delicious vegan food and played a balance game that had us in fits of laughter.

Birthdays have always been so special to me, because not only do you get to celebrate someone’s existence, but it has the magic of a Fresh Start. You know, that feeling that THIS IS IT, this is the time when you will become the person you want to be, or finally learn violin, or stop biting your nails, or start exercising. Am I the only one who feels this spark of magic? I can’t be, because I think the magic of the Fresh Start is what makes so many people set New Years Resolutions, or want to start their diet on a Monday, or when they move apartments or jobs or schools. Birthdays are one of those too. Of course, it’s actually arbitrary and sometimes the Fresh Start is used as an excuse not to begin right now, but when you’ve got the opportunity of a Fresh Start, why not use it?

If you’ve got a birthday or another Fresh Start opportunity coming up, what change will you make?

P.S. Happy birthday, my beautiful sister! Thank you for always being there for me and making me laugh <3 The world is a better place because you are here! xx

Our deepest fear

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.” – Marianne Williamson

I speak to so many incredible people who have shoved their impossible dream in their sock drawer hoping no one will ever find it, because they are terrified of their potential. Having great potential means the opportunity to fulfil it, and I get it, that’s ridiculously scary. What if we fail?

My heart aches for all of the people in history who never got a chance to try to fulfil their potential. The the enslaved, the oppressed, and the neglected. If you are reading this, you are one of the first people in history to have the opportunity to even try to fulfill your potential. Not only history, but also one of the few people alive today with the opportunity, the resources and the freedom to try. Most people – almost all people – have never had the chance to fulfil their dreams.

So here’s my question to you: Will you honour all those who have gone before you, all those who are here today, who could not or cannot try to achieve their dreams? Will you do what they dreamed of doing? Or will you sit in your moldy flat and watch Netflix all day?

You are powerful beyond measure. Use it.

Lost a day

We actually lost a day coming to NZ because of the time zones, so Wednesday didn’t really exist in my world! I’m posting this afterwards though - now that I’m in NZ and have wifi. On the flight I spent most of the time listening to podcasts, as well as brainstorming business ideas – I an idea that I want to release some of my exclusive content that’s usually just for my paying clients. It will be coming your way soon 😍 

If you’re a podcast person, read on. If not, feel free to skip this blog and check out another one of my many, many daily blogs (I’m blogging daily for two years straight!).

The podcasts I listened to and my takeaways:

The Life Coach School Podcast, Episode 190: Lessons from Frank Kern.

I am OBSESSED with this podcast. At first I thought it would be so cheesy because the name “The Life Coach School” is super generic. But now I’ve listened to dozens of episodes and it’s totally changed my outlook on many things, money in particular. I can’t recommend it enough, whether if you’re interested in Life Coaching or not. This episode was a Frank Kern is an online “Every business problem is just a math problem.” - Brooke Castillo (she’s the creator the Life Coach School). I love this so much. It’s really just a numbers game - e.g. how many people, how many goals, how much value, how much profit, etc. Everything else is just drama. And when you can focus on the marketing like it’s just math and drop the drama then you can let go of the stress and get back to actually helping your clients or customers. I needed to hear this!

Magic Lessons, Episode 208: ‘Leap into the Fire’ featuring Martha Beck. 

Paraphrasing: “They told me I was throwing my life away if I had this baby. And I said yes, I am throwing my life away, and thank god because it was awful.”

I’ve never heard “throwing your life away” used in a positive sense before. How amazing is that? Maybe throwing your current life away is the best thing you can do right now. Makes me think about the things in life that might need throwing away. Expired ideas, beliefs, values, even toxic relationships.

Lewis Howes, The School of Greatness Podcast: Marianne Williamson on Running for President.

As a NZ citizen, I don’t have the ability to vote in the US election, however, I am really excited about Marianne running for President. She would be phenomenal. I’ve followed her as a spiritual teacher for many years, and my mum used to have her famous quote on the wall as a kid.

These words I can recite from heart:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?”

One thing I adore about Marianne is that she really knows what she’s talking about. She didn’t just wake up one morning, cut and past a few ideas together, and decide to run for president. She has been doing her incredible work for over 50 years! She essentially wants a moral revolution. She wants to begin a Department of Peace in the government. She wants free education. She wants rights for women and people in poverty. Marianne, I hope you win!

Results are in

A while ago, I asked you guys what you thought the personal development capital of the world is (because wherever it is, I want to move there!), and I want to share the response I got. So many people responded to me on Instagram, and almost no one said the same thing! However, of all the answers I received, California seemed to have the most votes – Los Angeles, San Fransisco and Hollywood received votes.

Can you see me moving to Cali? Let’s see what happens!

Before and after

Let’s talk COMPARISON. I don’t endorse spending your time comparing yourself to others and their success, but when you’re aiming for impossible goals, it can be easy to think about the end result (and the people who have that end result) and compare yourself to them. I’ve got a video coming on this soon, which I’m pumped to share, but today I want to share a different perspective on comparison.

Today I had a light bulb moment – instead of fighting comparison, use it to your advantage.

Instead of simply “stop comparing yourself to other people”, I want to flip that to “stop comparing yourself to other people’s today.” Start comparing yourself to other people’s beginnings.

My biggest inspirations before and after. Brendon’s is about 20 years difference, Janni’s is about 7 years difference.

Where could I be in 7 or 20 years? Where might you be?

If you are really going to compare yourself and you’re at the before stage, then compare yourself to someone else’s before stage. It might show you where you could be after! Turns jealousy into motivation real fast.

Move Mountains

THIS STRUGGLE ISN’T EVEN ABOUT YOU. It’s about building your success story. It’s about inspiring others. You think your struggle is about you. But it’s really about your legacy. It’s about the lives you’re going to touch with the story. It’s about the people you don’t even know are watching you, who are being inspired. It’s about the impact you’re going to have on the world by overcoming this. It’s about taking every tiny, seemingly inconsequential choice and adding it up to achieve your mission.

Everything you’re struggling with – just remember it’s about something so much bigger than you.

You’ve been assigned this mountain to show others it can be moved - Mel Robbins.

Go and move it.

- Note to self.