Affirmations

As part of my morning routine this month, I’ve been focusing on affirmations a lot (particularly in the shower – a great time to do them!).

I thought I would share some of my favourites with you here:

• I am unstoppable!

• I am a person of excellence!

• I am abundant!

• I eat fear for breakfast!

• I commit to my goals and dreams like no one else!

• I know I will be successful because I will never ever give up!

• I show up for my dreams every single day!

• Every decision I make is the right one!

• The future is fixed in my favour!

• I am defying the impossible!

• I can create any result I want!

• I am willing to work on this until I’m 150 years old!

• I am unapologetic for being ambitious!

• The more money I make, the more people I can help!

• I have got my own back 100%!

• I can handle anything that comes my way!

• I am powerful!

• My goals are closer than I think!

• Everything I need is already within me!

Enjoy!

You Either Win Or Die

If you continue on your path and never give up, you will one day become a master. Or die.

That might sound kind of dire, but I actually find it quite reassuring.

Gymnastics
Knitting
Cooking
Acting
Blogging
Makeup
Jet-skiing
Investing
Coaching

No matter what your craft is, if you never ever give up, there’s only two options.

And failure isn’t one of them.

Haters Are Actually Lovers In Disguise

So I shared a post about my goals in a Facebook group, and a guy commented saying “cringe.”

I clicked on his profile and immediately this quote came up:

“In a world where you can be anything, be kind.”

I’ve been having discussions with a lot of people in my life recently about being a “good person” or a “bad person”.

I don’t believe there’s such a thing. People aren’t good or bad. Every action gives us a chance to be kind or unkind.

He chose an unkind action this time, but I can clearly tell he is trying to mostly take kind actions, so I have no hard feelings.

A new belief I’m choosing: haters are actually lovers in disguise.

How to Make No-Drama Decisions

What if you just made a decision? What if you knew it wouldn’t matter either way? What if you believed that the future is already fixed in your favour? What if you chose to believe that no matter what decision you make, it will be the right one? That all roads lead to Rome?

That it doesn’t matter if you choose to stay or leave your partner.

That it doesn’t matter if you choose to go into debt or not.

That it doesn’t matter if you take the job or not.

That it doesn’t matter if you do the thing or don’t do the thing.

You can make the decision right now. No more drama about it.

I’ve decided to believe that the future is fixed in my favour. I feel so much better already.

The More I Have, The More I Can Help Others

“It’s not right to be rich when others are so poor.”
”It’s not right to be happy when others are so unhappy.”
”It’s not right to be loved when others don’t have love.”

All of these statements are beliefs I see in my work with my clients often. I’ve been aware of thinking some of these thoughts myself before.

Here’s why none of it is true.

Because:
”I can do more to help others when I’m wealthy than when I’m broke.”
”I can be of service to others more easily when I’m not worrying about my own issues.”
”The more love there is in the world, the less suffering there is.”

The first set of beliefs feel rooted in lack and fear, and they evoke guilt.

The second set of beliefs just feels so much better, right? They are empowering. They are inspiring. They make me want to make this world a better place.

Sometimes I feel the need to justify my goal of creating a million-dollar business.

But I know that the more money I make, the more I can help others. The more jobs I can create. The more impact I can make in this world.

I have let go of my guilt for wanting more. Because the more I have – money, love, happiness, the more I can help others.

You Can Create Any Result You Want

We live in an infinite universe, with infinite possibility. Any and every possibility you can imagine is available in this world. You just have to align yourself with it.

Alignment: a tool for creating any result you want. 

Coming soon.

Why You Should Take The Risk You've Been Holding Back On

Taking risks doesn’t always pay off the way you expect. But it always pays off.

Every investment I have ever made – into my personal development, my studies, my work, my health – has always paid off.

I’ve made some great investments, and I’ve made some unwise investments too. The kind where they promise you oodles of money if you just sign up for their “special secret system” and you end up feeling bamboozled and asking for a refund.

This didn’t just happen to me once. Or even twice. This happened to me three times.

At the time, it felt like I had been ripped off.

But then, a few months down the track, I saw how the investment might not have directly paid off, but indirectly, it taught me a lot about business. A small price to pay for a lesson learned.

I don’t even care that I lost money. If I had to do it all over again, I’d do it exactly the same.

I want to live a life of bold moves. I want to be the kind of person who takes risks, and believes in herself.

My great aunt bought a house before she even saw it.

Some might say that is foolish, but if it is, I aspire to that kind of foolishness.

I want to take giant risks and live with my heart on my sleeve. I want to live.

What Do You Need To Believe That You Don't Believe Yet?

In order to achieve your goal, what do you need to believe that you don’t believe yet?

Make a list.

Start working on making those desired beliefs your actual beliefs.

See what happens.

Q&A

I get questions a lot so I decided to do a post, and I asked for questions on Instagram. Here are your questions, and my answers. Let me know if you resonate with any of them!

How did you know that you wanted to pursue a career in personal development?
I never had one single “a-ha” moment that led me to working as a coach, but more a series of “ohhhhh….” moments that built up to send me down a path slowly until I ended up here. As a kid, I never wanted to read fiction, I was mostly interested in non-fiction about real people, real stories and what they did, thought and felt. I remember at about age 14, going into a charity book store and seeing a book called The 9 Secrets of Women Who Get What They Want by the ex-editor in chief of Cosmopolitan magazine, Kate White. I opened it to a random page, and it was coincidentally a chapter of her talking about how she went to Mount Kilimanjaro, which I was about to climb. To this day, it is still my favourite book in the world (think Carrie Bradshaw meets Tony Robbins). From that book, I discovered the world of personal development, and I started to devour books on self help, psychology, philosophy and religion. That lead me to go to university to study psychology and philosophy (and I also took papers on theory of religion). I guess I was subconsciously trying to answer the question “Why are some people happy and successful when other people aren’t, even if they have similar circumstances?” That question still drives me today. While at University, I was set on being a clinical psychologist. I thought it meant I would sit in an office with a long sofa, asking “and how do you feel about that?” until it turned people into the happiest versions of themselves. It turns out, that’s not what it is at all. I remember the exact moment that I decided not to be a clinical psychologist: I was in a room with a student-professor who was tutoring our class, and training to be a clinical psychologist. I asked him what he did with his day, expecting an answer about the long sofa and his patients, and instead he said he spent most of his time treating brain injury patients at the local hospital. Oh… so you’re kind of a doctor. It was then that I discovered psychology is actually the study of what is wrong with people. It’s a wonderful profession and we need more people who want to do that. But it’s not me – I want to study what is right with people. How do people thrive? What makes someone happy? How does one fulfil their potential? After that point, I felt lost. Through a series of lucky events, I joined a Facebook Group full of business coaches. I started coaching people on how to grow their Instagram accounts, and although I made money doing it, it wasn’t fulfilling. I went travelling to “find myself” because that’s what people said to do (and realised I didn’t need to find myself, I had always had a very strong sense of self). While traveling, I had a lot of down time, so I listened to audiobooks. I discovered the brilliant book, High Performance Habits by Brendon Burchard – and that’s when I discovered High Performance Coaching. The rest is history.

What country do you want to visit most of all?
Ooh, such a good question. Tahiti was on my list for so long, and I went in 2017. It was the most beautiful place on earth, I’d love to go again. The place I’ve never been to that I most wish to go to is New York, although I have been to the USA several times before. I guess that’s not really answering the question – so I think it would be the Bahamas!

How do you define success?
I’ve thought about this a lot. I believe success is feeling content with the stage of growth you’re currently in. The pursuit of success is success.

What are your ultimate habits for happiness?
1. Gratitude journaling. This single habit has made the most profound difference in my day-to-day happiness.
2. Making your work something you enjoy. You don’t have to have found your “ultimate calling” but certainly doing something you like to do cannot be under estimated.
3. Meditation. I know it’s cliche, but I love to do a guided meditation. They put me in such a good mood.
4. Social connection, no matter what, every single day. Psychologists show that the number one predictor of happiness is our social connection. I usually do a zoom call (during isolation at the moment) or have a coffee/go walking with my friends when we’re not in isolation.

If you could give only one piece of advice, in one short sentence, what would it be?
If you want to change your life, change your identity. Instead of asking yourself ‘What do I need to do?’ Ask yourself, ‘Who do I need to be?’

How do you maintain consistency in your zest for life?
This is going to sound weird, but I think about death every day. Not to a degree that it makes me feel sad, but I often think “I better give that person a big hug in case I never see them again” or “I should give this run my all, in case it’s the last time I ever get to run”. I thought other people thought about death a lot too, but I asked my sister and she said she almost never thinks about it. I think there’s a degree where thinking about death would be debilitating, so I don’t mean to say we should all think about how we will die one day and never leave the house because we are so scared. But I guess I’ve just always had a deep sense of my own mortality. When you feel that way, it’s easy to have zest for the smallest experiences (I often think about how grateful I am to be doing the dishes, or how lucky I am to hear my partner snore at night, even when it drives me bonkers).
Remember today could be your last. It changes everything!

Do you love trains?
I’ve never been asked before! I suppose I do love them, because they have transported me to some of the most beautiful places in the world.

Do you love armies? Example: US, Australian and your NZ army.
I would never join an army (I’d hate to go to war!), but I think it would be a great challenge to see if I could pass the fitness and mental strength tests.

Do you have a good book recommendation? I am in desperate need, haha.
Oh, where do I start! Here are some of my favourites from each category:

• Relationships: The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman, How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie

• Career: The 9 Secrets of Women Who Get What They Want by Kate White, Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill

• Habits: High Performance Habits by Brendon Burchard & Better than Before by Gretchen Rubin

• Entrepreneurship: Anything You Want by Derek Sivers

What are your impossible goals?
I’ve got a whole blog post dedicated to this here.

However, they are:

MY COMPLETED IMPOSSIBLE GOALS:

• MEDITATE DAILY FOR A YEAR (Completed 24/04/2020)

• BECOME MY OWN BOSS (Completed 25/04/2018)

• MOVE TO A NEW COUNTRY (Completed 05/10/2018)

• CLIMB KILIMANJARO (Completed 01/07/2011)

• TRAVEL EUROPE FOR 6 MONTHS (Completed 05/10/2018)

• VISIT MY DREAM DESTINATION: BORA BORA (Completed 18/04/2017)

MY CURRENT IMPOSSIBLE GOALS:

• BE ABLE TO DO 100 PUSH UPS IN A ROW (Currently at 50)

• REACH 100K SUBSCRIBERS ON YOUTUBE

• START A VIDEO INTERVIEW SERIES

• DO A BREAKDANCING WINDMILL

• BUILD A MILLION DOLLAR BUSINESS

• DO A TED TALK

• RUN A TROPICAL RETREAT

What’s your evening routine?
Every night before bed, I create a to-do list for the next day, and then try to put it into my calendar so I know when it is all going to get done and not just hope it will get done.

I always set an alarm on my phone and leave it on the other side of the room so I have to get out of bed to turn it off in the morning.

I brush my teeth, put on my pajamas, and then often journal if I feel like I need to get my thoughts out. However, I try not to do any visualizing or planning, because if I do, I start to get ideas. Ideas are honestly the most magical thing during the day, but at night, ideas are the one thing that stop me from sleeping. Instead of lying awake at night worrying (like most people), I lay awake at night getting excited about ideas and plans and opportunities. It could be 2, 3, 4 in the morning, and I could be exhausted, but if I start to have an idea, the next two hours are a write-off, I can’t sleep at all. It really is a problem! So to combat this, once I’m in bed, most nights I do a guided meditation to get me in the mood for sleep. My favourite mediations are by The Honest Guys on YouTube.

Do you consider yourself as someone who is balanced? If so, what’s your secret?
I’m not sure what you mean by balanced, but I can interpret it as balanced in life in general, like a work/life balance. My work is my life, and my life is my work. All of my hobbies tend to be personal development related, and so is my business. So, I don’t think I would say I am balanced in the sense of separating time out in my day to do only work things, or only exercise things, or only relationship things. I share my life online a lot, so no matter what I’m doing, it could be considered work. But I LOVE working! My work is my passion.

What is your age and goal?
I’m 23, and I have many goals, see above!

What is your favourite movie?
Ooh, this is such a tough one, I have so many! Love Actually, Legally Blonde and Inception make it onto my top three.

How is your dramatic move across the world affecting you?
I’m pretty lucky because I was planning to move back to New Zealand from England in two or three months anyway, so I was mentally prepared. Coronavirus just made the move very sudden. I’m sad that I didn’t really get to say goodbye properly to a lot of my friends as we couldn’t hug or see each other. Being in New Zealand is great though. I feel very lucky to be safe at home here. I’m sending so much love to everyone around the world who is being deeply affected by the virus.

Belief is the Key to the Result

We choose our identity (our beliefs about who we are) and because of that, we choose our actions, and because of that, we choose our results.

Identity > Action > Result

So if you want a new result, you need to change your beliefs about who you are.

I am a warrior.

I am someone who loves taking care of her body.

I am strong.

I am wealthy.

I am someone who manages money well.

I am generous.

I am f*cking unstoppable (this is my favourite mantra of all time. No matter how bad I feel, whenever I say this, I feel like I’m back in the drivers seat of my life, taking command).

I am

When you believe you are a certain way, you will act in accordance with that belief. It’s true. You don’t take action that doesn’t fit with who you are.

And the results you get are based on the actions you take.

So change your “I am” beliefs to align with the result you want.