Get in the arena
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood.” – Theodore Roosevelt
I was at an event recently where one of the guests drunkenly pulled me aside to give me her two cents on my career choice as a coach: “You’re not experienced enough to help people.” I just sat there, smiling and nodding, with no idea what to say.
I have often wished people understood what I do as a coach better. I occasionally receive criticism for it, on and offline. I get told that personal development is self-indulgent or superficial. However, today I want to share exactly why I disagree.
I’m outrageously passionate about personal growth because I believe wellbeing is a necessity, not a luxury. I believe it is a key ingredient missing from our world. Imagine if we empowered people to truly focus on strengthening their mental health and wellbeing, and living a life full of meaning and fulfillment – truly imagine how much better this world would be. Imagine if we took the time to reflect on how to be more loving, create less conflict, contribute more. And worse, look at what happens when we don’t. We don’t protect ourselves against becoming ill, and being sick is demands far more self-indulgence than investing in our wellbeing ever does. When you are sick, there is nothing you can do but focus on yourself. When you focus on growing and thriving and becoming the happiest you that you can be, you’ve got the capacity to give to others and you have the energy and stamina to focus on outward issues. Put on your own oxygen mask first before assisting others. Everyone knows that.
You know when you think of a really good come back to a comment someone has made, but it’s already too late? For me, that was today, which is about 3 weeks too late to respond to the critic at that event. This is what I wished I had said: “If you’re not in the arena also getting your ass kicked, I’m not interested in your feedback.” – Brené Brown
I’m almost certain one of the reasons my heart pumps blood around my veins is with the intention for me to do the work I do as a coach, a writer, and a personal development enthusiast – and as a woman with that much conviction I’m not about to dull my light or change my entire career just because a spectator is booing me from the sidelines.